Saturday, December 31, 2005

Cant do it

Well guys I told you I would give you guys Random things that were said to me this year, and honestly I tried but it all became too, sad. I can not remeber many good things that were said to me. Most seemed to be hurtful things by Sarah, lies she told.

And so the thing is, I wont subject you guys to whining like that right now. There was simply not enough positive things to chat about this year. Sure Charla happened this year, and she saved me from the holiday blahs, she came to late in the year to turn things around. Not her fault, we just really started talkin in November.

I could put the words of encouragement from Lukrativ, but some of that is so vulgar that it is not worth repaeting. And I think my blog has reached its Vulgar Limit for the year.

I do have things to be thankful for this year. And Friendships that will carry over to next year. I value you Constant Readers, I am not sure how I would have made it through this year without some of you.

In a few hours we cross a threshold. One that takes everything we did last year and dumps it into the vast ocean of the past. After tonight I can no longer say, i got divorced this year.

What can I say about the future. Well its always there, just like the past. Your past is like heartbreak. It resides somewhere in the back of your mind, maybe forever. But the Future is like Hope, it can be changed, if you just try hard enough.

What can I say about 2006, I dont know. It may be the year i fall in love again. it may be the year i actually finish a book. It may be the year that everything could change. But I just hope it is not as devestating to who I am like 2005 was.

Everyone have a happy new year. Be careful, be safe, and be loved.


Friday, December 30, 2005

Today and What is wrong with parents today

Sad and Cute, reminds me of my Tiki, I miss her.

Well I just got back from lunch with Charla. While I was on the way there, she called to tell me she would be about 15 minutes late. So I was going to be way early. So i just pulled into a place called Book and Music Exchange, where people can trade, sell, and buy used everything. Well Okay used books, music and games.

Well i told you awhile back, that after I had moved, I had not gotten back to the old house and removed stuff from the "Jacuzzi Room". There were photo albums, and role playing books, stuff I was coming back for that weekend.

Well my mom came by to pick stuff up, and everything in the jacuzzi room was gone. Well i found about 30% of my old role playing books. Sitting neatly on the shelves of the B&M Exchange. With prices of 9.95 to 19.95. Stuff that was very valubale to me. I wanted to cry.

The sad thing, the most valuable book there had been sold, it was a book from the 80 called, The Atlas to The Dragonlance Word. It is a very rare book, in fact the women who did the book died this year, Sarah had bought it for me from a used book store for $50. A book that had only cost $15 brand new.

Then i seen the book that I could prove was mine. It was a book that was autographed to me. I opened it up, and some one had ripped the autographed page out.

I could not prove anything, so i just walked out. I know who did it. I hate useless people in our society. White trash drunks, who think it was fun every saturday night to get drunk and argue in the back your in front of the idiot red headed children they had. And the cycle of will not end, because already they have soiled this planet with more useless children. Ughh

While I am on the subject of parenting, I want to add my two cents to it. I know I have no children, not from lack of trying or wanting, but when the weather is cold, Should babies be carried around with no blanket, and no shoes. Some idiot women and her shack-up-cant-speak-english boy friend came into our store the other night with a baby, with no blanket or shoes. In the rain no less. Great parenting lady. You got my vote for Parent of the year. What the fuck is wrong with people. Pnemonia people have you every heard of it. I swear I agree with josiah sometimes, i think you should have to pass a test before you can even have a child. And if you can not pass the test chemical castration. Right on the spot.

Okay rant over, I am sure that came off as very mean. What is wrong with people. I was taught in a High School Psychology class that after taking this class I would never again ask why people do the things they do.

I still ask that question every single day.

A girl that works with me, said the other day at her other job, a girl was doing somersaults across the counter of a pizza shop. And her mom stood there and watched. WTF

A women one day at the store just let her child run wild, knocking things over, did she bend down and pick it up. No

I know there are some good parents out there in action. Pro divorce, Lukrative and Ben. (Oh MY)

Oh well Rant over. I have to get ready for work, I still have my UTI and I am taking pills. They help a lot. I still have no clue what we are doing for NYE yet. I am sure nothing exciting. Charla has plans and all, so I am sure its me and the boys.


Also look forward to my instalment on the 1st, of things people said to me in the Year 2005. I got this idea from EPZ and I thought it would be kind of fun, sad, and heartwarming. I am sure there will be tears, laughs and fun.



Tuesday, December 27, 2005

I am so Bored.

Man I am so bored. See things get a little hectic durning the Holidays. People have other responsibilities, and your friends and family are pulled to the limit.

Right now I am already bored with the Prince of Persia Game. I guess I am more frustrated with it then really bored. So I am trying to keep from playing it. I have not played my Xbox online much recently because my buddies are rarely on when i am anymore.

Charla is doing family things. See here are some random facts about Charla, since I know a lot of you guys are interested.

She is 27, and she just turned 27 in OCtober, so that makes me about a year and a half older then her.

She is the youngest of 5 kids. Her family is spread from one end of the country to the other. She has a sister in Arizona, a brother in Alaska, another in Tenesse, and one here in Evasville.

All her brothers and sisters were given the same initials CMB, I will not tell you Charla's middle name because I am afraid she was not to happy with it.

Her sister in Arizona is a nurse, and she is the only one in her family I have spoken with.

So there is a little bit about Charla for you guys to ponder. See I told you I am really bored. There is just not anything on television until late at night. I am ticked at myself because I forgot to grab a copy of the Wedding Crashers on my way out the door tonight.

I was going to have my friend give me a haircut while I was over at my mother's apartment Christmas eve. But I was not feeling very good, had a hard time getting any sleep on the couch.

I still have a kidney infection. It seems like it is possible getting better. At least i hope so. I bought a big thing of water to take to work, it has to be about 2 gallons at least. And I drank 64 ouces of Cran-apple juice. I cant stand the taste of cranberry juice...

Not much else to say. I will sign off here for now.

Goodluck and Godspeed

Monday, December 26, 2005

I feel like crap

Okay, I am not feeling the greatest, the kidney infection or whatever it is has gotten better, but the cold has gotten worse. Charla told me she will not be able to see me for probably the rest of the year, soi she told me to go ahead and get sick and get it all out of my system, so we can get together after all that.

I have to go back to work tomorrow, I have had the last 2 days off, and I feel like I have been bumming it. Yet I just cant sleep. I think i should have no problem tonigh, I may even just tape Full metal Alchemist.

FMA is a Japanese Anime that I have totally gotten hooked on. You can watch it on Cartoon network. (wow no wonder Sarah said I was never going to grow up) it is a very mature cartoon though. The concept is that two brothers try to bring there mother back to life using Alchemy, but there is one law to alchemy, "Humankind cannot gain anything without first giving something in return. To obtain, something of equal value must be lost. That is alchemy's first law of Equivalent Exchange."

Well they try to use Alchemy to bring back there deceased mother, and in trying to do so, Ed, the older brother Looses his Right arm and left leg , Ed has a mechanical arm and leg. While his brother suffered a warse fate. Al lost his entire body, and his spirit is linked with to a suit of armor. The concept of the show is that they are trying to get their bodies back to normal.

Okay so it is not Pokemon, it is very mature, and i fel for some of the characters, and I have actually cried during a recent episode. There is a lot of background politics and character development. i love it, and if you are a fan of anime, I think you should check it out. My name is Robert and thats my pick for reading rainbow.

I have started writing again, i have actually written the last two days and finally I have a good story beginging that makes sense. Maybe I should keep an icon on the side of the screen to show my progress. We will have to see.

Well I am going to go lay down, I did hear fom Charla today, and I was not sure I was going to. Since her family were doing their Christmas thing.

Have a nice day


Merry Christmas to Me

Well I had a hard time getting to sleep last night. I am not sure what my deal is. I got up first thing this morning and went to best buy to get my Prince of Persia game. I love it, I have been playing it all morning.

I got something else this morning also, a kidney infection. It seems I may have consumed way to much soda over the holiday. At least it may be a kindney infection, i hope that it is not a kidney stone. Which i doubt it because Ben explained to me some of the symptoms of one.

I am drinking plenty of water today. Hopefully I can flush it out of my systom. I do not think it is that serious. I feel better as the day goes along.

Now back to my game, its wonderful. I usually wait for Christmas to get these games. I am a little sad that this is the last one of the series. And it seems to be the best one yet. I also still have a $25 gift card to EB games, but I may hold off and see if anything worth getting comes out.

Well i hope you guys have a better day than I am having. I also think I am coming down with a cold.

I hope everyone got what they wanted for Christmas. Have a wonderful day.


Sunday, December 25, 2005


Well i promised a Christmas day update earlier and you guys are in for a treat. Because I am going to give it you. giggity-giggity.

Well i had to work all day Christmas eve. But the first thing i see when I come in, there is a large yellow envelope laying on the counter. he same kind that our pay checks come in. I thoght that was odd, since paychecks come out next week.

I looked inside to see what it was for. And there was a check in there, for me. A bonus check. I hate to say it, when I opened it up, I cried. Or at least there were tears of joy running down my face. I was not expecting it, and I needed it something fierce. I was about broke, and I was running out of groceries. It was enough to make my day start off with a brighter note than usual.

Jesse called me, and I talked to him for a few minutes. I was pretty busy most of the morning. Luke showed up at 4 to do inventry stuff for the night. Torrie came it a little bit later for my help for the night.

I was getting ready to put some movies up, when Luke yelled my name. I turned around, and there stood Charla. She had brought me cookies and a Christmas card. And she had also brought Luke a bowl of home made cookies. She had been baking cookies all day, and was taking them around town to people. I was totally not expecting that at all. I hugged her and she went on her way.

About and Hour and a half before closing my friend Jarrod showed up. He was trying to get a copy of Serenity for his grandma. Unfortunatly we were all out. So he stayed for a little bit and chatted.

I was a little cranky by the end of my shift, in fact I was told I was complaining to much. I was just ready to get out of there. I had to drive a half hour to get to my moms house. She wanted me to stay the night.

Well I decide to go home and grab my XBOX, since a game I wanted to rent was actually in for once. (Half life 2) I called Charla and left a messaage on her answering machine. Well I had barly gotten out of the parking lot when she called back.

I talked to her for awhile. While I was gathering all my xbox stuff to take with me. And started my drive to Henderson. Halfway there, Jesse beeps in when I was talking to Charla. I thought he sounded depressed, so I told Charla that he sounded depressed, and that I would talk to her tomorrow at sometime, because she was not sure how much longer she was going to stay up.

He actually was not deprresed he wanted to continue the conversation we were having earlier. So i talked to him for a few minutes, and it seems on Saturday nights we are going to go back to role playing at Comic Quest instead of Matt and Jeff's house. Matt hates to play games with dice, and Jesse Jarrod and I are wanting to play something else. So we are going to stay at the guild and get over to Matt and jeffs afterward, like we used to do.

They are talking about letting me run Exalted again. I will have to see what Jarrod wants to do. Anyway half of you people have no clue whaT i am talking about so I will move on. Josiah you are welcome to join us to.

Called Charla back, talked to her for the rest of the ride to moms. When I got there, I walk in the door. it was like TWAS THE NIGHT BEFORE CHristmas. The only thing that was stirring was ben's son Scott. Who jumped up wehn I walked by the bedroom door, I think he thought I was Santa Claus and he was a little disappointed.

I spoke to Charla for a little bit and then called it a night.

I did not sleep much last night. Mom has a very uncomfortable couch. And I tossed and turned, and woke up to Ben messing around on the computer. We stayed up and talked for awhile. I went back to bed sometime around 5 or so.

Well my Christmas was not very exciting, but i got a few new shirts, which are nicer than what i have now. I am going to be at best buy first thing tomorrow morning. The Game I want is on sale for $30 Prince of Persia The Two Thrones. So i am getting my self a Christmas gift.

Well i hope everyone had a good Christmas

To my blog friends

Audrey, I hope you met a guy for Christmas or at least dont delete your blog
oh SO OWnderful and EPZ I am sure you 2 are going to have a blast
AnywherebutTX I hope the II (Intoxicated Idiot) Does not try to crawl into bed with you again.
The Bitch on the phone: I hope you choke on a fruitcake, (Just kidding)
Manda onfire I hope you are less busy next week and update your blog.
The King: I hope your son had a nice Christmas
Lukrative: Have a nice Christmas too. Enjoy those cookies from Chalra, I know I did
Wil: Love ya brotha, we miss you man

Good Night

(If your name did not appear on the above list I hope you had a wonderful Christmas, or I gave you a personal greeting earlier today.)

Merry Christmas

Well just wanted to say Merry Christmas to everyone out there. i am exhausted and i will have another blog update when i get home from my moms if i can keep my eyes open.

Have a great day


Tuesday, December 20, 2005

God Loves me... Everyone else thinks i am an Asshole

Okay, so not everyone, but the list seems to be getting longer. Maybe my ex was right, I am just not a good person to be around. First off I just have to say this. I am going to bitch about work, so if you all dont like it, quit reading. I never invited you here in the first place and if the blog police get pissed, I want them to look at my warning . There that being said I will continue.

Friday night, It was about 11:30 pm, I was waiting the rest of my shift because Charla was coming over to watch a movie with me after I got out of work. "Must love Dogs" was the title of the movie.

These two women come into my store, both obviously drunk. Talking loud, and stumbling all over the place. And yes they had driven there. One was a lady in here late 40's, and the other looked late 20's. I am sure they were related somehow.

They come up to the counter, and ask if we have any Mr. or Ms. Smith in. I told them no we did not. We had them all rented out

They asked if we had it for sell. I told them we did and showed it where it was out. They took a look at the price, and looked at me. $22.99, you are kidding right. Can we get a discount.

I told them I am sorry, I could not do that. We do not even get a discount on new movies. They babble a few more times about how another video store in town had it for less. But they closed at 11. Well I explained to them that again I was sorry.

Then they seen my name tag, and started to use my name. Robert, come on please can we have a discount. I said once again I am sorry. Well the younger blonde said, No her boyfriend Mo loved that movie ( I was wondering if it is the same Mo my ex dated.. more than likely it is in his age group, under half his age).

I took it from them, and proceeded to ring it up. The blonde started complaing again about the price. Still trying to get a discount. I was just trying to get them out of my store because they were being a nuisence.

Now the next line out of her mouth angered me to no end. Everyone who knows me personally knows exactly why, and knows why this pissed me off. I told her the total after tax.

"Well go ahead and rape me Robert, you are going to anyway, and I aint even naked..." The women that was with her even thought that was uncalled for, and said something too her relative or friend or whatever. Telling her that was rude...

"Well its the truth... he could have gave me a discount, he bascially raped me."

I held my composure, I watched the stupid bitch stumple out to her car. I almost got the license plate of the car and called the police. But I restrained myself. I can not stand to hear anyone say the word rape and especially about me.

I calmed myself considerable. I am sure she thought I was an asshole, but I could not help her, no matter how much she begged and pleaded.

Charla and i watched the movie, sitting next to her on the big comfy couch. She stayed til about 2;30 am or so. After she left I lay down and watched television.

The next morning I met my mom for Lunch at the mall. I talked to her for a little while, I even had gotten my gift card from Ben. (Thanks Ben). Then went over to Matt and jeff's house. We stayed up and watched the movie Serenity. Not much exciting, except they got me a gift certificate for the theater. So know I will be able to take Charla to the movies. Those gay fellows are just smart.

I called Charla for my ride home at 1:30 in the morning. Asked about her day, and she asked about mine, and told me how much fun she had Friday night. I got home and took a loratab and went to sleep. I have only been taking the loratabs when I go to bed at night. I think it helps me sleep. I sleep all the way through the night. MAybe I should get some sleeping pills after I quit taking the loratabs. I really have enjoyed this sleeping all the way through the night thing.

Well, my cell phone started ringing at 2:30 am. Josiah was calling to ask me if I had seen Jarrod's car.

I had seen it when I was leaving, I was half asleep, so i probably sounded like a smart ass. I almost told him that Jarrod was there tonight. I did not realize that he was asking me if I noticed that the window was smashed in. That I did not notice.

I asked if anything was taken. I was told that it was weir, there were gifts to Matt and Jeff in the car, all kinds of music cds. And countless other things. They took, from his car

1. Wax Paper
2. A Pair of tennis Shoes
3. And a dirty pair of boxer shorts.

Yes, I know. Weird. I am sure it is someone who thinks he is an asshole, and more than likely I am an asshole by association. See the count so far is 2 people think i am an asshole.

I get up and go to work On Sunday. After work I go back over to Matt and Jeff's.They offered me spaghetti, they dont think I am an asshole, but they probably think I am a bum. naaahhh.

I got home, called Charla, made plans to meet her after she got off work on Monday. I went and got pizza, and soda. We watched a Christmas story. She had never seen a christmas story. I could not believe it, So i made her watch it. There is so many things she has not seen that I have to show her.

She brought me a gift. She thought my apartment looked pretty bare of holiday cheer. She gave me a little porcelin tree that you plug in and it lights up. Very cute and very thoughtful.

So she went home, and I stayed up and watched Family Guy, Inuasha, and Full Metal Alchemist. (Guys can you believe I have actually had sex, and been married)But then again it could be part of the reason i am divorced too...hmmm

Now flash forward to today. My day almost starts out exactly like this.

Phone Rings
"******** Video this is Robert how may a help you.

Voice on phone: Is the manager in please

Me: I am the Manager on Duty
Voice: Is this that heavy set guy that works there.

I hate when people call me heavy set, I am sorry my weight is not determined by your fucking outlook on life. You know if I am so evil you would think you could remember my name, you know is the name on my fucking name tag. (Sorry I am really sorry if you are choosing to read this, I am just ranting.)Any person knows there Arch nemesies name you know. Do you think Super man goes around saying, yeah I hate that bald guy.. no he calls him Lex luthor.

Me: Yeah
Voice: No I dont want to talk to you, in fact I am refusing to come in there anytime you work. What time is your shift over.
Me: (thinking she was wanting to talk to my boss) Well mam the person you would need to talk to about me is not here until Tomorrow night.
Voice: No, I asked when your shift is over, i did not ask to talk to your boss. I cant stand you, everytime I come in there you give me some kind of fucking problem and no one else does.
Me: Okay well I get off at 6;00
Voice: Well i will be in there after you leave.
Me: okay?
Voice: Fuck You... click

The sad thing is, i have no clue who this person is. What i did to cause them trouble. But you guessed it. They think I am an ass hole, and fat to. But whatever.

Then i just had a bad day after that. i got to thinking about Christmas and thinking how different It will be this year. I like Charla a lot, and she does treat me right. But I had to admit I missed Sarah a little bit today. I missed spending time around the holidays and everything. Not saying I want ever be happy again, but this Chritmas has been hard on me. This year has taken a toll on me. I am sure 2006 will be better.

Have agreat day...

I hope you all have lovely Christmas if i dont blog before then.


Friday, December 16, 2005


Well folks here are the pictures. I got her to accept putting her pic up on the blog. So here is the picture we took from our first date. please ignore the clutter in the background

And here is the picture of the Christmas tree that i helped decorate.

I hope you guys enjoy.

Have a great night


Thursday, December 15, 2005

Oh Christmas Tree

Wel Tuesday night Charla invited me over to decorate her Christmas tree. I was pretty tired but sucked it up and went over there. i hada good time, all though she could tell I was tired. The good thing is that my mouth only got sore about half an hour before I left.

The loratabs seem to help with the pain, and with my sleeping. I have taken one every night since Monday. And all three nights i have slept like a log, most nights I toss and turn. The only side effect is every night I have some kind of dream about Sarah. Not sex dreams, but dreams of us having conversations about stupid crap. I just think that is odd. The one Monday night was me yelling at her about ruining my life, until she started to cry. Then i felt bad. It is just really odd.

Yesterday ben called me and aksed if I wanted to go see King Kong with him, his treat. He called at 9:30, and it started at 10. In his defense he did send me an IM asking me if i wanted to go. But I was in a Loratab induced coma.

I jumped in the shower, and held off Laundry duty for one more day. (Now however I have about the equivialnt of three loads of laundry. I never realized I even had that many clothes.)

King Kong was good, I liked the stuff from Skull Island more than the time time they spent in Manhattan. So I have to say I was pleased, Ben liked it also. Although he did say the first hour in a half or so was boring.

Friday night after I get off work Charla is going to come over and we are going to watch a movie. Since she thinks she is going to be very busy on Saturday. Its kind of nice to spend time with her and still be able to hang out with my buddies.

They all want her to come over with me. They said they would like to have an actual girl to hang with us. And since Josiah hates women, and Jarrod is dating the most annoying thing in the world, or is gay and lying about it. Then the duty falls to me to bring in the woman.

Well it looks like I am going to be getting off Christmas day. The trade off, I have to work a double on Christmas Eve. Which means a 12 hour shift on one of the busiest days of the year. But I can handle it. I have worked every Holiday this year so it will be nice to get one off.

Well thats everything that is going on. I hope you guys have a great day. I should have pictures of the Christmas tree tomorrow, and I will post it.


Monday, December 12, 2005

Pain... Death... Extraction

Okay so after Charla left on Saturday, I went and met my mother at target. We walked after we left target, down to a little store called Kirklands, basically they sell home decore and such. Right now its 90% Christmas stuff.

Well all i can say is after my little walk, for about a block in the cold December air, my tooth started to throb Just a little at first, I thought it would go away. I went home and took a nap, Mat and Jeff were supposed to call me after they got out of the movie. My tooth was bothering me before I took a nap.

Wehn I woke up, I thought the pain hand gone away. Mat and Jeff called, and I started not to go over there, cause I knew it was going to start hurting. but I sucked it up.

It continued to throb a little more. By the time i left there, i was in pain. I came home and tried to do anything in the world to get my mind off the pain. it just kept getting worse.

I lay down for the evening, and fell asleep. When I woke up in the morning, i was feeling okay. That lasted til about 9:45 am. By the time noon rolled around, after all the customers were out of my store. I sat on the floor and started to cry in pain. Yes I was in the much pain. Nothing could be done until Monday anyway. So i stuck it out at work. (I was not going to call to see if anyone could come in for me.

About 15 mintues before my shift was over, the pain stopped. I had to go see my mother again after work, because I needed toget her half of the cell phone bill. I forgot to get it from her the day before.

One thing I can say is this. As bad as this divorce was on me. It has been the greatest thing for my mom. She is never home anymore. She is out doing stuff all the time. In the last six months, she has been drinking margaritta at a mexican resturaunt with her co-workers, going to church, shopping, shopping and shopping. We should have kicked her out years ago. j/k.She is never home when i cal her anymore. had to meet her at the K-mart in henderson.

After i left there, i was still not in that much pain so i went on over to Matt and Jeff's house. It seems liek anymore on a Sunday night its just me and Josiah over there with Matt and Jeff. Well Jesse's mom has been sick, in fact she is going up to Indy this week to have surgery, there is some kind of infection with her pace maker. This is the 3rd time she has been in the hospital in the last month or so. I hope she is going to be all right, i am worried.

Well by he time I left there I as in horrible pain. Every time i touched the tooth I was in pain. It was going to have to come out. So I was at the dentist office at 7;15 this morning. An entire half hour before they opened. I was getting the tooth taken care of.

I have to admit I was a little scared. It had been a while since I had a tooth removed. I did not feel a thing. Well at least not during the prcedure. After about 15 minutes the novicane started to wear off.

They gave me laratabs for the pain. Which i am not sure if it is doing anything or not. I was hurting for the longest time after I got home. I am getting ready to take another one here fairly soon.

Charla is trying to baby me. She offered to bring me soup, or some other kind of food. But I am not that big a wus. As much as i would love to have her company, I am not sure that seeing me in my sick and wus stage would make her feel like I am a big strong macho-wacho guy.

But the evil tooth is gone. It will bother me no more. And I just cant wait for the pain to officially go away.

You guys have a wonderful day.


Saturday, December 10, 2005

Date Number 2

Can we actually call it a date. More like the second meeting. I call it a date. I was totally going to help her decorate her tree.But circumstances stood in the way of such things.

So I invited her over to hang out. She was going to take me out to lunch. I declined because I could not mooch off her. I just feel slimy when a girl pays for a date, even if I am all about being the pimp juice now. [:)Whatever lukrative and Phil]

So instead she said she could cook a pot of chili and bring it over. Which i thought was a better idea, and she already had the ingredients, and i would feel less like a bum because we are using my electricity, my couch, my sweet tea, and my heat. She was just provideing the chili and the company, (both of which are okay with me).

She warned me her chili is spicy. And to quote Josiah, "I thought I was going to have to the Kerosene soaked rags." Why is that again Josiah.. "To wrap around your legs so the ants dont eat your candy ass"

She toned the chili down for me. She was worried that I would burst into flames. In the end it was not very spicy. So now she knows that i can handle it she will make it with more spice next time.

She also came bearing gifts. How sweet is that. Over the course of conversation, talking about the snow storm, she asked if i had a ice scraper. I told her I used to but could not find it. I also had mentioned that i was going to need to pick up a pair of gloves. Well I dont need to know. She bought me both items. How Sweet is that.

And when I mean I was going to buy me some of those jersey gloves you get at a gas station for $.99. These are insulated, bulky, warm gloves. These things have more insulation then my coat.

Also she brought me a Cd with Christmas songs on it. I put it in and listened while we talked. I am actually listening to it right now. I am so much more in the christmas spirit then I thought I ever could be this year.

I am getting ready to leave her to go see my mom at Target. her and her best friend are driving over here to go shopping. So I thought I would meet with her for a little bit.

All my friends are going to see Chronicles of Narnia tonight before we meet for our Saturday night thing. They invited me to go, but I did not have the cash to go, and besides Charla had said she was interested in seeing it also.

So far today has been great. I got to see Charla, I am going to go see my mother, and then i still get to hang out with the boys. Saturdays are becoming extrememly busy for me nowdays. Which is good. I miss feeling important. Now I feel important every Saturday.

Ladies, what do you get a girl that you have not known very long for Christmas. I need your expertise on this one. Oh so Wonderful and Audrey, come on you know... I need some help here. Charla No peeking.

Later guys

Wednesday, December 07, 2005

Snow is going to be falling

Well as i right this here blog, the news weather folks in our area are calling for 1-3" of snow. And in a way this frightens me. I never like driving in snow. I was always nervous when it came to getting anywhere in snow. At least it will not be 20 some inches of snow like last year (remember abondoning me and Michelle at BBV lukrativ after we dug your car of the snow)

I know my ex wife is pretty excited about it. I have not talked to her since I ran into her at the grocery store, but I know she will be. She always loved the snow, it was one of the times she was the happiest.

This year I will have to be even more careful. I have no one to come save me if my car breaks down, well i guess Charla would but it is not the same. I would be more hesitant to ask her for help, since it is a budding relationship.

Although we were supposed to go sledding on the first snow, but her knee has been bothering her for a week now, so sledding is out this time.

I think snow is beautiful, when I do not have to be out in it. I used to act like I hated it, but secretly I loved it. It made everything look so clean, energized, hopeful. I used to love the smell before it snowed, the way the air smelled was just different. I made Sarah think i just hated everything about snow.

Well this year it may be true. I have never driven this car in snow. I wont get to watch my dogs run through the snow for two minutes and then think, hey, this is not cool we want in daddy. I won't have to clean the windshield off her car anymore. And I am guessing I will not be looking out the window and watching it fall with a cup of hot chocolate this year either.

But who knows, maybe this time next year, somethings may be different. So I toast my cup of Hot chocolate and say, Let it Snow.

Tuesday, December 06, 2005

12 hours and 21 minutes AND Christmas gift ideas for the gamers in your life

Okay so we backed down on the christmas decorating tonight. We are going to do it during the day on Saturday. She does not want me to sacrfice my time with my boys. She says it is very important to have a social life outside of my time with her. So thta I can understand.

I know you guys are trying to figure out the title of this blog, and what it means. Well wonder no longer fair people.

I have a vonage phone service, it works over your broadband connection, its is called a Voice over internet Protocal I think. One of its nice features is that it keeps track of how long you are on the phone. It also tell you which numbers you have called.

Well 12 hours and 21 minutes is how long that I have talked to her on my voange phone alone, since Novemember 24, thats not including all the time we spent chatting on the phone before that. It also does not including all the phone calls from my cell phone (Most of the time I talk to her on my cell phone after 9 Pm or on the weekends when i am out and its free) That is a long time to talk to some one on the phone, but I love it.

I actually have not played much Xbox recently, but i guess Masta Chief got worried. He called me today while I was at work. Left a message on my answering machine. I will have to get on and play some tomorrow. Let them know I am still alive.

Well I am glad I did not have the money for the XBOX 360 after all. Seems like there has been trouble with the first batch. i still want one just cant afford one right now. Besides i am not an idiot, I would not pay thousands of dollars for one on ebay to begin with. The new games arent that great.

I would just be happy this Christmas to get myself a copy of Prince of Persia 3 on Xbox. Its the only game left this year that I did not buy myself that I still want.Other than that there has not been any great games to catch my eye. Earlier in the year we had Resident Evil 4 on Gcube, God of War on Ps2, Battlefield 2 Modern Combat on Xbox... but I have had all these games already.

I also do not believe the playstation 3 will make it out util 2007... I may be wrong, but I usually never am when it comes to games... I can tell you this much, it will not be until Quarter 4 of next year at the earliest. They have said March, but thats because they are trying to convince you not to buy an XBOX 360.

Right now I would not buy a PSP there is nothing out there that i can not play at home on my big PS2 to make it worth it. I still have not figured out why everyone is so excited about the psp movies. I mean they are just as much as dvds and you dont get any of the special features. I think they are kind of a waste.

So there is a few of the hot games for christmas. I have had most of the great games, but I will give a short list.

On PS2
Wwe Smackdown vs. Raw 2006
God of War
Socom 3
Dragon Quest 8
Game Cube
Resident Evil 4
ummm.. okay not much on the game cube this year
Far Cry Instinct
Battlefield 2
Half Life 2
XBOX 360
Call of Duty 2
Elders Scrolls 4 Oblivion if it makes it out by the end of the year
Perfect Dark Zero

Most off the games above I have or have already played until I was sick of them, but they may be something others maybe looking forward to playing. Well igues I just kind of rambled on aout nothing in paticular. Everyone have a great night.


Monday, December 05, 2005

The Big D, And I don't Mean Dallas

Last year we bought a house from a guy. He was a real nice guy, and I did not know too much about him really. We learned about him from a girl my ex worked with, because she bought a house from him.

Well he rents a lot of movies from the video store I work at. A few weeks ago he came up to the counter, while his little girl was looking at the candy isplay, laughing and talking about stuff.

"I think I am about to join your club" he said to me. i was a little confused at first. I was not sure at first, i thought he was wanting to sign up a Blockbuster Rewards membership.

"So what club is that." I asked Quizically.

"The big D" And for the first time I realized that he did look upset. He looked tired and worried. I have to say I did not know much about him. My ex had dealt more with thme than i had while we were trying to get the house ready for us to move in.

We did not talk much about the situation. He did seem rather concerend. I just never had though of him as a man who would give two shits less if he was married or not. He pointed to his daughter and said, you know I have a kid.

Well I talked to him tonight, he was on the phone with his wife, while his daughter was looking for movies. He was trying to stay away from her, because he and his wife were arguing. he later camer up and apologized that he had to have that conversation here. He looked even more distraught.

I just thought of him as a guy that had been divorced before. I never realized that he had not. And even stanger it seemd like he was looking to me as the great sage of the land of divorce.

I talked to him, comes to find out we shared the stories of how it all happened. Wife starts telling lies to everyone about you, you I told him that sounds familiar... She gets a new boyfriend.. yup, that too. Someone shows her attention and whamo.. she is gone.

The only difference is that he has a child. A little girl who is 4 or 5. And he is scared. I felt sorry for him. I knew what it was like to think that the only person in the world that you trusted could do some much damge to everything. like me he said is filing bankruptcy more than likeyl, he doesnt want to go through all this. But what can you do, you can beg until your blue in the face but if they dont want you, then tough shit. Adios Amigos.

I wished him well, told him good luck. I hurt for him because he is exactly where I was in the end of April. So then about half an hour later my help for the night shows up.

The new guy is a little strange, he seems to have scared another employee somewhere else. So they shipped him to us. The fact is I hate to say it, I actually like the guy. He is staying in his parents basement after coming home from California.

He lived In santa Monica, and he was staying with a girlthere for the last seven years. Then the simlarities seemed to add up again between me and him. Girl gets promoted, gets stressed ou, he is the one that held her hand. Kept her together throughout the years. Until finally one day she decided that she did not want him anymore. He never made enough money. He did not care about her or at least that what she claimed. Suddenly she dumps him, and then she starts to date a Lawyer who has a nice house, a porshe and money out the yin yang.

Wow did I not see all those things happen with my ex. Yeah i guess I am still a little jaded. The new guy is like, I will never get married, i think it is a dying institution. I think some day there no longer be marriage. He said that marriage worked when people actually thought it meant something. He says now that no one really believes in the vows they take.

I disagree. I am going to get married again someday. But i do seem to think he is right. Women are getting to be worse about cheating on spouses and everything. i am not saying all women are evil like the three examples above. I know Charla would never cheat on someone. I also know that Audrey is a great women too.

I just think a lot of women do not alue marriage anymore eithier. They have made it too easy to get a divorce in this country. In Canada i think it takes 2 to 3 years to get a dvorce, and you have to go through some kind of counseling or something. but then again if their hearts arent in it. Why prolong it.

I never wanted to get a divorce. I tried a thousand times to get my wife to come home. So no one could say I never tried to get her back. But the fact is, it did not matter, the damage was done.

Yet in all this sadness, I have hope again. In all my misery, and I stood on the edge of my Faith and looked out only to see dispair that nothing was every going to change. I really thought my life was over when she left me. So i know how this guy must feel, and to have kids on top of it. I could not imagine it.

I just dont know. If there is any women out there now that is reading this and is thinking of walking away from thier husband remember this. it aint all puppy dogs and rainbows. Life can hurt, but if you rely on that other person, spend just half of the enrgy it takes to lie about them, on trying to tell them the truth, things can get better. No one is perfect. but life should never be this hard.

And remember that in the end, maybe it just wan not meant to be and that there is a better person for you out there. I hope I have found that person.

I think i finally understood what this song meant when I was going through my divorce, I hope this helps you understand also.

"My Immortal"


I'm so tired of being here
Suppressed by all my childish fears
And if you have to leave
I wish that you would just leave
'Cause your presence still lingers here
And it won't leave me alone

These wounds won't seem to heal
This pain is just too real
There's just too much that time cannot erase

When you cried I'd wipe away all of your tears
When you'd scream I'd fight away all of your fears
And I held your hand through all of these years
But you still have
All of me

You used to captivate me
By your resonating light
Now I'm bound by the life you left behind
Your face it haunts
My once pleasant dreams
Your voice it chased away
All the sanity in me

These wounds won't seem to heal
This pain is just too real
There's just too much that time cannot erase


I've tried so hard to tell myself that you're gone
But though you're still with me
I've been alone all along


Good Night everyone. Have a great night

Sunday, December 04, 2005

The date

So guys, Im am wondering if anyone wants to even read this. Maybe I should just not tell you guys about the ate. Everyone thinks it is not important right...

Okay... I will let you know. We decided to meet at my apartment, at 5 pm. She showed up, and I thought she was gorgeous. We talked for a few minutes, introducing ourselves. Then we left.

I good man pays attention when talking to a women, and I am a good man LOL. She said one of her favorite places to eat is a place called Charlies Mongolian Barbacue. I had never eaten there, but have passed by it countless times since I only lived about 2 blocks from there a year ago.

Basically you get a plate, pile it up with noodles, vegetables, and Lots of different meat. You take it to another guy, who pours on some kind of sauce. Then they take it to this huge hot plate and dump it on there, and use to sticks to push it back and forth to cook it.

I had never been there before so i actually got more noodles than meats. I will change that next time. It gave us time to talk a little As we ate. It was very good, and i am definately glad she shred that place with me.

So after we left we went down the street to the Indoor Mini-golf place. I had been here before but we always played outside, but the inside was pretty neat also. I told her I was going to beat her at minigolf. And I did... maybe I should have let her win, but she would have beat me something fierce if she could have got the ball in the hole, instead she kept going in the water. (Which meant that I had to reach in and pluck the ball out of the water hazard every time. Which had a bluish toliet wate r tint, that i just knew was going to die my hand blue. Luckily it did not. Cause i did not want to go around the rest of the night looking like I was turning smurf.

So we left there, and we hit the road again. There is a huge thing that we have every Christmas called the Fantasy of Lights. They turn one of the parks here into a huge Chritmas light display. I had never been. Oh So WOnderful think you so much for that suggestion because I never would have thought about it at all. It was gorgeous, and I really wish it had not been raining, and cold because I would have loved to have gone on a carriage ride through the park.

After that we came back to my apartment. She talked about how much she loved Christmas and we sat around and watched the movie "Elf" which I just think is hilarious. Some people do not like it, but i do. Charla loved it also. She was cracing up every five minutes at something. She is a lot like me in that way.

I took advice from a co-worker, Torrie. Not to talk about the ex wife. i think I only mentioned her one time, because it had to do with a funny story. I cant remember what it was that I told but other than that I never mentioned her.

I also have the most comfortable couch in the world. Everyone comments on how comfortable it is when they come over. I only payed $50 for it used. Although Charla dribbled some sweet tea on my cushion, so I will have to try to get that up LOL.

After Elf we watched Meet the fockers. She said she loved the first one So we watched the second one. I was a little nervous, because that movie is a lot more vulgar than I remember it to be. But she survived it. At least I did not have her watch any of my Jay and Silent Bob movies.

So here is the plan, next week, maybe on Tuesday, she is inviting me over to help her hang up Christmas Decorations at her house. She spent most of the day Saturday hanging up the outside ones. We even drove by her house so i could see them. She did a very good job i thought, her house looks very cheerful.

The bad thing about her house is that she lives in the same neighborhood as my ex's Grandparents. She thinkis I am a little freaked out about that, but not really. She lives a block away from them, and they are good people. I think the rest of her family is shit but her Grandparents are good people.

So that is how everything went, we ar planning for our next meetings. I like spending time with her. I am still trying to get her CD that she made for her parents. She went down Last Christmas and with her very musically talented brothers and Sisters cut a cd of music for her parents for Christmas. She played me some of the stuff were she was solo. She is very talented at singing. I wanted a copy but she said it was not that good. So she said I could not have a copy. Oh well

Well everyone have a good night.


Friday, December 02, 2005

It's Clobberin' Time

So I have one more day until the date with Charla, for those playing along at home, the date is Saturday. It is at 5 PM and what am I doing to plan for it today. Laying on the couch and watching movies that come out next week. Thats right folks, I could be planning something romantic and thoughtful, instead I watched The Fanatastic Four, with that one chick, I can never remember her name.. EPZ who is she again ;)

I was never a Fantastic 4 fan. In fact I never really liked any comic books until Wil came into my life. He introduced me to Spawn and the X-men. i really loved the Xmen animated series. (Which i heard they now have a 4 season set for like $50, that would be great to have) I know have a new appreciation for the Fantastic 4. Well at least the movie form. I am not sure how acurately it mimics the comic book.

You see, Ben Grimm actually reminds me of myself. He had everything going for him in his life. He was married to a women who loved him. Well one day he changes, not really like me or anything, but his wife can't stand to see him as he is. Now i am not a big orange piece of rock, but it wa ssad to see his wife could not except him for what he was.

That struck a cord for me. It seemed so familiar. To loose everything that you cared about so suddenly, I knew how he felt. But at least in the movies "The Thing" found love again, in a blind women. See he met someone who could see him for what he was, as a whole. I can say i have never saved a fire truck from falling off the brookyln Bridge, but I tried to do good for those around me. I have a huge heart, and I am hoping that soon it will be appreciated.

I cant say for a fact we will hit it off yet. I cant say that once I meet her my life is going to get so much better, but I can hope it will. I feel with all my heart, I can do no less than that. i cant help it when I am sad, i cry, when I am happy I laugh uncontrollably and sometimes, yes i snort. I am who I am.

So One more day, and counting... Everyone send me your good luck wishes. I hope to have a good update for you guys on Monday. Or maybe even sooner. You all have a great rest of the weekend. And if things dont work out with Charla and I, at least I can say I am not made out of orange rock.

Thursday, December 01, 2005

Image hosted by

Okay i thought i would have a little fun at my own expense, since now people are calling me Pimp Juice at the office i need to include this warning on my blog.