Wednesday, May 03, 2006

Fees Yo... 25 cents to connect

Okay I had a funny experience last weekend that I some how forgot. We went to the mall, Josiah, Matt and I. As we are walking toward the music store, a group of guys are walking towards us.

Josiah points out that it is a group of guys that look very similar to the guys who do the T-mobile ads. They are dressed up in all kinds of bling, I mean if you put a pictures of these guys next to the Poser Mobile guys, I bet you would not tell them apart. One of them even had the belt buckle with a digital display.

I only wished I had my camera so I could have taken that picture to share with everyone.

Not much going on, just my boring old life. I did talk to bank girl today. I think I am a lot less nervous about talking to her now. I think I had myself so hyped up that I had to ask her out, I was getting to worked up.

I decided to just talk to her, I asked her how her weekend was. She replied that it was good, then she elaborated on it. She said she spent yesterday helping her mom with yard work and and mowing grass. A lot of information for a simple question.

We talked about the rain, because she said she had gotten rained on yesterday while working in the yard. She asked how I was doing, and I told her pretty good. So hey, I feel good because I actually talked to her, that's a big step for me. And I am getting the definite feeling that she does not have a boyfriend. Not many people would hang out with a parent and do yard work if they were in a relationship. I could be wrong.

So I am going to see how talking to her works out. Maybe then slip in a you wanna go out for coffee sometime, I just have to not get myself so worked up. All I know I have been feeling depressed for like a week now, and her smile and conversation seemed to revive me a little bit.

I went to the cemetery to visit my dad's grave yesterday. It had been a while since I had done that. Mom wanted to drop off some new flowers, since his birthday is coming up on the 14th. The day before mine.

"He was his 35th birthday present and I had been paying for it every since" was his favorite quote when talking about our birthdays being a day apart.

Yup I will turn 29 this year. I am pushing 30. I would never have guessed at 29 my life would be so empty. I guess they are right, happiness has its way of taking its sweet time. I guess this birthday will be as depressing as the last.

I am coming up on my year anniversary of blogging. I started this blog on May 11th. I guess that is a small triumph. Not many blogs make it to a year. I may not get as many comments as other blogs, but I have been here a long time. I guess to say that I felt my life was over a year ago, and I am still here.

I may cry here and now, I may sometimes miss my ex. I have dated, and broken hearts unintentionally but I guess its all part of my story, and dammit I aint dead yet.

Well good night all.