Friday, February 10, 2006

Valentines Day is Fast Approaching

Well Valentines day is fast approaching and I already have my course of action planned out. I am buying me some alchol and getting drunk off my ass long enough to forget it ever happened. Well I will have to work during the day, on this miserable day, but after that its all me time.

Something tells me though, that I will probably not do that. I will probly sit her in this apartment with all the lights off, and soak in the misery. I have survived a birthday, Thanksgiving, Christmas, An Anniversary, and now this is it. The last holiday without her. After this the cycle starts over.

She left on March 22 of last year. Its been almost a year. You know, I have never thought it possible to feel numb for an entire year. I have come a long way, and I would like to say i did it on my own. But it has not been all me.

So how did Valentines day go last year. Well honestly it really did not go at all. I had to work Valentines day night. The weekend before we went to Owensboro. I bought her a cd, and a bottle of massage oil, and this really awesome massager ball. We celebrated Valentines day that weekend. Then the day before Valentines day we went out to eat.

The weekend after valentines day, we went up for Madison's birthday party. I had such a good time. I was excited, because we thought we might be pregnant. I never felt so good in all my life.

Looking back, I am sure she was relieved that she was not. She had been telling everyone I was cheating on her, and that we were not sleeping together. So if she would have came up pregnant, I often wonder what would have happened. But it was never meant to be.

Post like this, are reasons I never keep alchol in my apartment.

You Guys have a great Day.