Tuesday, October 11, 2005

Something Nice About the Ex Wife

Okay I know I throw a lot of info about the ex wife. It mostly bad or how much i love her. But one day last week, or maybe the week before, she said something very nice to me.

I had been at work all day. And my stupid ass left the parking light on in my car. So by the end of the day i had run the batery down to where my car would not start. I paniced

I had no jumper cables and I was not sure if the next guy coming in would have any, much less if he would even still have his car, most of the time his wife drops him off. I am not good in situations where I can not get back home. I had a panic attack.

Turns out the co worker had jumper cables, (After I had called Ben and he drove all the way over to help me out)I was able to get home that night.

I was telling Sarah about the situation and she, asked why I did not call her. She would have helped me out. Now I opened my big mouth and said, "I cant keep calling you to bail me out of situations all the time. Its not your problem." I hurt her feelings, I tried to smoothe it over as soon as it left my lips because it sounded very harsh. Harsher than I would have liked.

She said she had to go after that. Later KI knew she was mad when I sent her a text message to see how she was doing. She was really short with me. It was not just me that she was upset with, but I think that sometimes it bothers her that I try to do things for her, and that i turn down help from her. I am not sure why that is. I only turn down the help she offers because I always took advantage of the stuff she did for me. So in a way what i do for her is my trying to make up for the laziness that exhisted in our marriage from my point. That and i just honestly care for her.

On a side note tonight I had a thought and laughed about it. See whenever I would be going to a job interview the next morning, i always got, Good Luck Nookie. Thats what she called it. I had to laugh, I loved good luck nookie. I am guessing there will not be good luck nookie tomorrow night since I am not in that stage with anyone, but I can still smile about it.

The bad thing about good luck nookie was this. It always added more pressure to me. Because I wanted the better job to make her happy, not for myself. I like where I work, but this time around I am doing it for myself. I want this job for myself.

on another side note, the only reason I got this job test was because of AMndi, and now she may not get to take the test because where she works, the other employee quit. So she wil have to work on wednesday. I feel bad about that. It is just not fair. But look at it this way, thats one white female that is not ahead of me. One down no telling how many more to go.