Tuesday, July 11, 2006

Can I have A Sucker

The day did not start off the way I really wanted it to. It being a Tuesday, all I wanted to do was go to the bank, and see the bank girl. When i get to work, we are being audited.

It was not as bad as I thought it would be. I always hate when he audits, because I always feel like he goes everything I have done in the last three months with a fine tooth comb. I think he found one sort of major screw up on me.

But thats not the story of the day. The story of the day starts with the bank, as all my Tuesday stories do. As soon as I come in the door, she sees me come in, and smiles and says hi. Then a guy and his little daughter go to her window.

I am next in line so, of course I have to step down to another window, but the good news is its the one right next to her. When I step down, she tells me that She had not seen me in awhile, I jokingly ask her if she missed me. She laughed and said she did, its been awhile since she had seen me. (Yes she did repeat again that she had not seen me in awhile, which is true, I had not talked to her for 3 weeks.)

Well the guy she was waiting on was trying to cash a check, but he had to fill out a deposit slip. So she was busy doing that, she asked the little girl if she liked the rain. I thought that my business at the bank was going to conclude before his.

So I hear her counting the money to him, and the teller I was at was just about done with mine. She was trying to run a reciept through a machine. But Bank girl was still counting the guys money.

Then the most awesome thing happened. The machine kept rejecting the receipt. She had to spend 30 seconds to fix it, and just s sson as she got it done, I hear bank girl say, "There you go" and no one else was waiting behind me in line. That meant that i would have time to walk over hand her the card, and say something like... I have been trying to give this to you in weeks.

The stars had aligned, I was ready to do it, I had it in my pocket, my fingers were brushing against it. I was flush with excitment, the women got the recept to go through and handed me my bag, as bank girl asked the guy, "IS THERE ANYTHING ELSE I CAN DO FOR YOU TODAY?" I could hear a choir of angels singing, this was going to be the day that changes my life, I already had the song picked out for our wedding.

"Can I have a sucker?" Was how the little girl replied... those 5 words, ( okay its only 4 words and an article) In a perfect world, the suckers would have been sitting on the ledge, for all the children of the world.

But this was not my fucking Wal-Greens Comercial, and why should it be. Because you see I am not meant for happiness. Bank girl looked around and realized she had no delcious suckers to hand out. I stood in limbo, do I wait to see if this happens very quickly, or do I move on.

I stood dumbfounded, for an eternity. If I was a large cartoon character I would have probably smash a rubber hamer over the little girls head. (No children were harmed in the writing of the blog post -ED) I stood long enough fiddling with the bag, that I looked and felt almost like I was stalking her.

I knew that I was not going to be able to give the card to her, I was already standing there too long. I walked past her, and the kid and father. My head actually slumped. ANd behind me I heard her say to me.

"Hey, have a good day. See you later."

I turned to see her smile. as she handed the little girl a sucker. And for once my brain was elsewhere, thinking thoughts about how miserably close I was. And somewhere my brain let something loose, that I am worried to death about. How I replied.

"Thanks, and you know what, I kind of missed you too..." Where the hell did that come from. I might as well said, "Will you have my babies?, or what do you look like naked?" I wish I had actually said something like that now, because I could have pleaded temprorary insanity.

Its like I took a leap, but never left the diving board. How miserable is that.

She replied, "Ahh thank you"

After I got outside, i kicked a rock. Later I will feel sorry for the rock. It did nothing to deserve its treatment. And you know what, being a bully to a rock is not helping me one bit.

Oh well, Next Tuesday is another day. I have hope again because I made an idiot of myself, and if she is still overly friendly to me then she might just be interested.